


Growing Apart

by lastcrazyhorn



Series: Get What You Want [4]
Category: Midsomer Murders - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, F/M, Falling Out of Love, M/M, Sorrow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 18:27:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28532901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastcrazyhorn/pseuds/lastcrazyhorn
Summary: Tom and Joyce have a long overdue conversation.Someone cries.(Maybe me).
Relationships: Joyce Barnaby/Tom Barnaby, Tom Barnaby/Male OC, Tom Barnaby/Male Reader
Series: Get What You Want [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2080776
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3
Collections: Midsomer_Melee





	Growing Apart

**Author's Note:**

> **[Y/N]** = Your Name

Tom was in bed with Joyce, the next evening. Y/N had left and he was missing him. It was the warmth at his back, the careful regard for his injury and the general interest in his body that he missed. 

When Joyce had gotten home, she had flitted about, talking his ear off about nothing and everything, most of it he didn't care to know about. She had squeezed him lightly on the shoulder at one point, forgetting that it was his injured one, and he had hissed at her in pain.

Of course she had apologised, but the fact that she had forgotten at all still rankled.

She had ignored him as they had gotten undressed, and other than a kiss goodnight, she had not touched him since that aforementioned accident.

Now she lay on her side of the bed, and he on his, and he felt the distance keenly.

"You are thinking too loudly, Tom," She says, breaking into his thinking.

He sits up and leans his cheek on one hand. 

"I miss Y/N," He admits quietly. 

She sits up and reaches out to touch his arm. It is a gentle touch, but it isn't what he wants.

"Do you think it is possible to still love someone, but not be _in_ love with them?" He asks, breaking the silence after a few moments of awkwardness.

"Oh, yes, Tom. Yes, I do. I think it's happening between us, and it's been happening for a long time."

Neither of them speaks for several moments. 

He feels sorrow for losing what he thought they would always have. 

"Would we get a divorce?" He whispers, barely willing to give thought to the whole thing.

"If that's what you wanted, I would, but I don't think we have to," Joyce answers in a thoughtful tone. "I love you, and I know you love me, but . . ." She trails off for a moment. "The spark just isn't there anymore. It's not something we did to ourselves, and certainly not something that happened on purpose. It's just--" She frowns in thought. "We outgrew each other somewhere along the way."

_Joyce's words make terribly good sense_ , he thinks, dropping his chin to his chest. 

"But we're comfortable together?" He asks, already feeling the answer in his heart.

"Maybe too comfortable, Tom. I think of you as a brother, almost. Someone I can hold and be safe with, but not someone that I want to show my knickers to."

He laughs in surprise, and in the dimness of the bedroom, they smile at one another.

"Maybe it's time I took my girlfriend up on her offer to let me stay there more. I daresay you won't miss me too much."

He rubs his eyes and pulls his knees up to his chest. He suddenly feels very vulnerable, and misses Y/N even more. He doesn't want to have this conversation.

"You wouldn't want the house?" He asks, his voice still very quiet.

He wishes they weren't having this discussion at all, but he understands the need for it.

"It's too big for me, and Jeannette lives in London. I wouldn't want to ask her to move. At least Y/N lives here in town," She points out.

"Yes, yes he does," He murmurs in agreement.

"You should talk to him. See if he'd be interested in more."

The pattern of his world is breaking up around him, and he doesn't know exactly what he wants anymore. 

"I'm too old to have a midlife crisis, aren't I?" 

"I'd say, you're long overdue for one, Tom. You've been the steady and stalwart one for too long. It's not weakness to admit you want someone to hold you. To keep you safe?" She looks at him with far too much understanding. "I was like that once, with you, but as I got older, I didn't need you as much. I don't think you ever needed me. Not in the same capacity, anyway," She hastens to add.

"I needed you for the longest time, Joyce," He admits aloud, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. 

His voice is choked now, and she turns on the light at the sound. Her arms go around his shoulders in a familiar way, and a few tears slip down his cheeks because of it.

"We might always need each other. I'm not saying that we won't, but we don't need each other for the same things anymore," She says with a muffled voice, her face pressed into his chest.

"It'll be okay."

He nods, not trusting his voice. There is a cold lump in his throat that is threatening to undo him completely. 

"I'll always be your friend, Tom. You know that. I still love you."

"But you don't want me."

"You don't want me either, Tom."

It's a harsh thing to say, and it makes him pull away from her completely. He swings his legs over the side of the bed, and buries his face in his hands. 

"It's true," She says, voice gentle.

He nods. 

"It's true," He whispers. "I'm going to call Y/N. I need to talk to him."

**Author's Note:**

> At the end of this story, I plan to upgrade the Reader character into an actual OMC (Original Male Character). But that would be for the next series. His name will be Martin.


End file.
